Hibernation and Freedom of Choice

August 14, 2006 · Filed Under Uncategorized · Comment 

We are right now in the “hibernation” phase of the pregnancy. This stage of the pregnancy is marked by fatigue, so we stayed indoors and enjoyed a few more naps than usual this weekend. Also, the fact that the temperature hovered around 100 didn’t give us much incentive to head outside.

We’ve gotten around to telling a few more people the news, but are being cautious. Once we hit the three month mark, we’ll be a little more relieved, since many miscarriages happen during the first trimester. We try not to think about that too often though, but the anxiety is there. Kandis read in one of her books that the statistic is something in the neighborhood of 20% for miscarriages in the first couple of months. We talked about this a bit, and when you flip the statistic around, the percentage is 80% that everything will be fine.

Kandis and I got into a discussion Saturday night about discipline. I was giving the dog a hard time for something, and Kandis didn’t like the idea that I was so inflexible; she was concerned that this type of inflexibility would carry over to the way I rear our child. In hindsight, it was really a dumb thing to be annoyed about. I was irritated by the fact that she wouldn’t drink her water because there was ice in it. “Sometimes…”, I began to lecture, “you have to deal with what life gives you. If she’s thirsty, she’s going to have to learn to drink the water, even if it’s not what she’s used to.” Kandis reminded me in the human realm, it’s OK to have preferences, and there’s no reason a dog shouldn’t be able to have preferences, either.

Kandis was right. When it comes to children, however, I don’t think they get a lot of choices at first. I’m all for a few preferences, but sometimes, a child is going to get something they don’t like, and they’ll have to learn to accept that life is just “that way” sometimes. Obviously, they don’t have that type of reasoning at age one or two. There’s nothing wrong with getting people accustomed to the real world starting at an early age though, say three or four. Unfortunately, life doesn’t always give us what we want from it, and I think that can be taught to a child in a positive way. I think as our child gets older, they can be presented with more choices. Choices are, after all, a part of getting older. Unfortunately, though, choices can sometimes make life more difficult. I talk tough now and probaby sound like I have a very negative outlook on life, but I’m sure I will soften up once we have the child. I probably won’t have much of a choice in that matter!

Tags:

« Previous Page